Hi to all you human people out there! It me, Muffin, with more fun stuff for you to read today! Me hope you will all like what I pick out for you, so please read and feel free to laugh. If you not like jokes, do not say something, I hurt easy and then my human get sore feet so he hurt easy too. Now you can read humor stuff.
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When I was a girl my momma would send me down to the corner store with $1.00.
I'd come back with 5 potatoes, 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk, a hunk of cheese, a box of tea, and 6 eggs.
You can't do that now...too many security cameras.
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When I get to where I'm going, will somebody please tell me where I am?
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Me: {sobbing my heart out, eyes swollen, nose red) "I can't see you anymore. I am NOT going to let you hurt me like that again!"
Trainer: It was a sit up. You did one sit up.
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Each day I try to enjoy something from each of the four food groups:
- The bonbon group
- The salty-snack group
- The caffeine group
- The "What-ever-the-thing-in-the-tinfoil-in-the-back-of-the-fridge-is" group.
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What's the leading cause of dry skin? Towels.
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One sunny morning a woman shook her retired husband awake.
"How about helping me straighten up the house today?" she asked.
"Why?" he replied, "Is it tilted?"
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A man was shuffling along, bent over at the waist, as his wife helped him into the doctor's waiting room.
A woman in the office viewed the scene with sympathy. "Does he have arthritis with complications?" she asked.
The wife shook her head. "Do it yourself," she explained, "with concrete blocks."
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It is true that light travels faster than sound.
Perhaps that is why some folks appear bright until they speak.
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That all for today human people! Hope you like reading with morning coffee time!
Have nice day, from Muffin.
©2023 Steve McLeod.
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