My late brother Eddie's birthday approaches. He would have been 67 on September 5. I know that's not young, but we were not finished being brothers, and I still have a difficult time accepting his sudden illness and loss. It takes up a large space inside me, as I'm sure such deaths affect millions of other men and women. I've read some helpful passages about dealing with grief from the loss of a sibling, but recently found an interview video of the actor Billy Bob Thornton most enlightening of all. It takes the deeply personal, self-conscious sadness to a place of honor. If any of you have lost a sibling — especially a younger brother or sister — you might want to listen to this video on YouTube. I've transcribed part of it below.
"I have to really force myself to think that things are going to be OK in terms of worrying about my family, myself or one of my friends. … There's a melancholy in me that never goes away. I'm 50 percent happy and 50 percent sad at any given moment. … I don't want to forget what it felt like when he died, because he deserves that — that's how important he was to me. So, if I have to suffer and I have to be sad for the rest of my life, and if I have to be lonely without him… then that's the way I honor him."
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