Whatever darkness it is you are going through, I am right here with you. The challenges you are facing. The fears that fill your mind. Constant worry. Heartache. Emotional downpours. Sadness. Pain. These are all temporary emotions, not long-lasting, suffering and agony.
Friends I know what it's like to be held captive in your own mind. A prisoner of war, a battle that we fight against ourselves. Always on guard. Always ready to defend ourselves. Always ready to react and retaliate to protect what it is we have come to know as our own truths.
Do you want to know something I've learned? Fighting with ourselves wastes a lot of precious time, energy and moments that can be spent loving ourselves, family, friends, even complete strangers. Time that can be spent focusing on all the good things in our lives, all the things we are grateful for. Don't ever take those for granted!
Love really does conquer all! When I am in a healthy state of mind and perspective, I see things the way they are, rather than what I believed them to be living in a "fog brain." A reality that is distorted by lies, thinking and speaking poorly about myself.
We all have trials we go through in life. No two of ours are alike. At the time, I thought I would never see the light of day. I thought I would never have the muscles to smile again. I never thought the pain would go away. I really thought the dark valley I traveled in was my new normal and that's where I would remain.
I was a hot mess, or just flat out, a mess! Whatever it was I needed to go through, I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but it was the path I needed to take.
At the time, I thought being broken was a bad thing, losing what seemed like all control over everything! I didn't realize how powerful God was. To speak His name. To call out to Him at the lowest point in my life.
Had I not broken into what felt like a million pieces, who knows where I would be today. Would I still be living my old ways?
Everything that has happened until this day has all be a part of His plan. The brokenness was all supposed to happen exactly the way it did. He found a way to my heart. A miracle happened at that moment. Transformation began. My turning point. The moment when I knew no longer could I stay strong and do things on my own. I submitted to Him.
Ever since I've been doing my best to love and serve Him. Getting to know Him more intimately has taken a lot of faith, trust, patience and time. There are moments when I don't hear from Him as often, and that's okay. Most often times it's because I have too much inner noise and chatter within myself, lack of peace and alone time spent with Him. I know He is with me at all times. He hears my heart. He knows my thoughts. He understands each tear drop I cry and what that means in my life.
We are to live with joy in our hearts. There is so much to be grateful for. Learning to see the good in all things may not be easy or realistic, but it is attainable. Maybe not right at this very moment.
Know someday there will be a breakthrough. The light and love of God will once again shine through you!
I love you my friend!
God saved me! He gave me another chance at life. I chose to trust and believe even though I didn't understand. I went through all kinds of emotions day in and day out. At every new level of healing, there were obstacles I needed to face.
Was I intimidated? Scared? Weak? Vulnerable? Of course! I was all of these and more.
Did any of the adversities and fears stop me from living the life God called me to be? No! I knew I had to keep on going, keep putting one foot in front of the other. Celebrate the milestones no matter how small they may have seemed.
Progress is progress!
I stepped out in faith, learned to put my trust in Him. That was extremely hard for me to do! Giving up all my power! How weak, I thought. Little did I know how strong I really was!
To this day I stop and reflect on the person I was back then. There has been spiritual growth and maturity as I've learned to walk by faith not sight. I realize how far I have come in my journey and that's something to be proud of! I have grown in my faith. I've learned the importance of leaning on and depending on Him.
There is HOPE!
Never once did my love Father ever give up on me! He continues to love me throughout ALL seasons of life, and He loves you very much too!
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