dear jimmy fallon, here's some anonymously hysterical

carla

Nov 30

The person who left the first comment on this post above ⬆️ is my hero. I laughed so hard I spit out my coffee this morning.

When Facebook first allowed groups to have anonymous posts, it was a great idea. That way if somebody is looking for something super personal like where to go if they are being abused in their home etc they had knowledge of community resources they might not know existed.

But anonymous postings have turned into things that I think should be sent to Jimmy Fallon for the Tonight Show because they just make you laugh. Like looking for a plumber. Why is it so hard to publicly ask if you're looking for a plumber? Or a string quartet? Or an exterminator?

Anonymous posting on Facebook has become the witness protection program for the theater of the absurd.

I am sorry not sorry that I think most anonymous posting has become the theater of the absurd. And if you say you think it's absurd the samey same police come out.

So yes, apparently I am a mean horrible person that these things posted anonymously crack me up. And then, of course, there are other people that say I have some nerve when I'm posting anonymously. Actually, no I'm not posting anonymously, you just don't know who I am because I can choose whom I want to actually know. I am Carla and it's not exactly a secret.

Then there was this whole thing because I actually asked the question if someone was looking for places to volunteer for the holidays why was it an anonymous post? I mean first and foremost you don't even know exactly where they live, so how can you direct them to a volunteer opportunity near them? Is this person embarrassed to say they want to volunteer and give back during the holidays? I think anonymous posts in these Facebook groups should be for sensitive subjects not general crowdsourcing and if this person and I said it sounded like a woman writing the post. Because to me, it sounds like a woman. It's all about the phraseology.

Now the best comment on my post asking about this particular anonymous post came today from a veritable Valkyrie who called me a misogynist. How does she figure that precisely? Because I said someone posting an anonymous post sounded like a woman? That's an opinion that's not misogyny or practicing misogyny. But for this chick as a woman, calling me a woman a misogynist that's just her opinion. But for me, expressing my opinion, it makes me a misogynist.

Think about it for a moment: do you think anonymous posting was created for mundane things? I think it was created for sensitive topics. And how someone thinks a plumber recommendation or wreath making class are sensitive topics escapes me. And people make up these absurd reasons as to why somebody is anonymously posting like if they post anonymously, it will cut down on their chances of being hacked and impersonated on Facebook. Or that they are uncomfortable posting on Facebook to which you always have the reaction of then why are they on social media?

One of my favorite anonymous posts with somebody asking for what product works best to spray your hydrangea bush with so the deer don't eat them. I'm sorry is this person's hydrangea bush in the witness protection plan for gardens? And the other one is looking for a string quartet to play Bridgerton music. They had me at Bridgerton and Lady Whistledown too….

So Jimmy Fallon, if you're ever reading my blog I have material for you 🤣 (and I can hear the music you will be playing in the background 🤣)

Carry on.