Monday

ZeroSpace

Jun 19

Productive day so far. Blood draw at labcorps for my thyroid. First time I've been referred out (small community health clinic with no lab), so I didn't know it would entail sitting around for an hour waiting to be called up. I made good use of my time while waiting though. I've discovered there's all kinds of stuff about long covid on YouTube, so I set about watching and educating myself. Also, my FB promo is paying off. A gal answered all excited about my group because apparently she never gained her smell and taste back, as she stated in the comments. That sucks. I mean, it all sucks. But that really sucks. If that was me, with the eating problems that I already have, shit, I'd probably be just drinking Boost and Ensure. It goes to show that as bad as it is, man, it could always be worse.

The phlebotomist was skilled - I looked away and didn't feel a thing. Afterward I went over to some other clinic and gave them a flyer. Then headed to Providence Hospital, hit up the front desk and the nice ladies said they'd put one in the ER waiting room (score!) And somewhere else. I was gracious and thanked several times. Then I hit up the library but they were closed for some reason so I went to some other little clinic and gave them one.

I feel quite accomplished and it was nice to get out of the house. I had designs to go back out again after the lunch I am eating and hit up more clinics, but my instinct tells me I better chill and save it for tomorrow. And generally limit movement if I expect to have brain power tonight for other tasks.

Also, my other disease is tugging at me. I passed O'Blarneys Irish Pub and a little leprechaun popped on my shoulder and said "nuk nuk nuk, aye, why don't ya swing in there darlin' and ask 'em to put up a flyer in exchange for buying a beer in their establishment on a Monday, aye??? Nuk nuk nuk?"

I told him to shut the fuck up because it's never just one and that a bar is a shitty place to post a health-related flyer anyhow. I skipped the naltrexone today in favor of not feeling weird, so I'm glad I had enough sense to tell him to fuck off. It still tugs at me, but I reason that if I decide later that I really want to be that stupid, well then, just go ahead and take one of those naltrexone pills an hour before you go out. That is another way to do it. Because that's how the European doctors do it anyway. The idea is you don't give up your bar socializing, you just take it an hour before you head our because upon completing the beverage you're not going to get the happy little buzz anyway. But you'll still feel wobbly in the body and bleary, even if just a little, which tends to discourage rather than encourage further imbibing.

But I don't think that's going to happen. I'm feeling decent today and I don't want to screw that up one way or another.

I made meatsauce. B showed me that you can use both crumbled beef but also cook up Italian links and throw them in there. Why did I never think of this? It's amazing. I just has some. Shells were the noodles. I am now all kinds of happy for the moment. 2 reeses cups and a little half and half (half a cup haha, it's a coffee-less Breve).

I seldom have dessert. Reeses cups were my dessert. And I ate the whole bowl plus a buttered sourdough round slice and a couple handfuls of potato chips. I'm seldom such a pig, but it was all very good. Maybe because I am finishing up my period, I don't know. Anyway now I'm on to a cup of black&green tea and then I'll figure out my next move forward. Likely chores and job hunt activities. I can't see myself heading out again today and I'm not mad about it. I really don't need to be going out to a bar even if I do swallow an alcohol blocker first. I mean really. I am enjoying all my accomplishment dopamine right now. Even eating a big meal as a person who hates the process of eating- if I nail a big meal (especially after cooking it myself) I feel like I have achieved something and I get the feel-goods. Which is great because the last two nights I've had awful anxiety attacks that I dealt with sober so I deserve to feel good. Today was mushroom micro-dose day and that may be helping. Anyway I'm off.